Hello lovelies, this is a really spontaneous and impromptu post, but I really wanted to write something, whether it gets read or not. 🙂
Today I want to talk about my personal experiences with Mother’s Day. I suppose the title of this post is rather ominous and it’s worth mentioning that my mother is still around, I just haven’t talked to her for 8 years now. [EDIT: I totally changed the title, as the previous one was Surviving Mother’s Day Without A Mum] I’m pretty sure she doesn’t even know about Luke! But I do have friends who’s mother’s have sadly passed away. This time of year, you see so many mum’s making cards for their children’s grandma’s and celebrating things with their mums and all the buzz around gifts, spa retreats and the like. All of this is lovely. Honestly, it’s so nice to see people appreciating their mums – whether they’re a parent or not. But sometimes, it’s not so easy.
Without going into too much detail, for various reasons, I don’t talk to my mum anymore. That is totally my choice and I do understand that. But there’s no relationship there, no trust, no nothing. Therefore, it’s a no go. Obviously she feels the same, as she has never once tried to contact me since I was 15 and left home. Well, actually I came home and received her subtle message when I found out she’d changed the locks on me while I was at my first day back at school after the summer holidays. So, since then, Mothering Sunday hasn’t been the best of days for me – it’s depressing and I just seem to get a bit down.
Now that I’m a mother myself of course, there’s a new, happy energy around the day. I should feel blessed and forget my past and accept the wonderful life I have created and my wonderful family. But I just can’t seem to shake the grump.
However, over the years, I am pleased to say that it is only a grump. That’s it. I don’t feel psychotic, or hysterical or crazy or angry towards the world. Just a little bit grumbly.
And that’s okay!
Obviously, this blog post is unlikely to appeal to many but there is one thing I have learnt over the years that I still tell myself now, even though I am a mother myself:
The emotions and feelings you have; they’re okay. They’re normal – you’re allowed to feel that way! Anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong. They’re unhelpful and ignorant and you should ignore them.
So, I would just like to end by saying – how ever you feel this Mother’s Day:
|Picture from www.yourdailypositivity.com|